Rhod Gilbert on BBC Radio Wales.

 

If you are listening to this, you are listening to Rhod Gilbert's Best Bits, some of the best bits of my Saturday morning radio show, live on BBC Radio Wales.  This week, I'm in my kitchen with Tom Wrigglesworth, and we are joined by Nicola Mantalios-Lovett.

 

Regular listenrs to this show will know that ... uh ... Tom Wrigglesworth, ... uh ... sometime co-host, occasional co-host, and ... uh ... Captain Features, also known as, um ... usually arrives at 1 minute ... / Yeah, / ... before the show starts or 30 seconds before, / I've got __ __ / ... strolls in, and then, ... the last time you were here, you said, the reason for that is that, whenever you arrive earlier and we start talking, I always say, "Stop it.  Save it, save it for the show.  Don't say anything." ... / You do. / ... and, so, you arrive late to avoid that awkward silence. / Yes. / 早くつきすぎると、しゃべりたくなる。しかし、しゃべるな、と俺は言う。本番のためにとっておけということだ。しかしトムにはそれに耐えられない。その沈黙に耐えられない。だから本番開始ぎりぎりに来る、というのがトムの言い分だが、 / Well, today, you arrived at about ten to. (10 minutes earlier than the start of the show) / Yeah __ __ / Bravo. / __ embraced the silence, uh ... and ... and also, my ... um ... flat mate was going on a march ... uh ... / Huh, / ... near Hyde Park, so, I ... / what kind of march? ... sort of ... um ... / Student thing. / I presume not a facist sort of ... uh ... / No, no, no, it's not that sort of ... __ I know the world is in turmoil __ __ / 今の情勢だと、ファシストのデモがあっても不思議じゃないけどな / __ __ __ I wouldn't be surprised. __ __ __ __ __ I can't even laugh ... I can't even laugh about it.  What kind of march is it? / Student ... / A demo? / A demo, yeah, yeah, ... going from ... uh ... I think __ Hyde Park to Westminster, and, so, I thought, "Huh.  That would be a quick way of going to Rhod's __ __ __ I'll catch the march. / Oh, I see, so, did ... did you ... No. ... What?  You thought, "I know, walking through London, often through the crowds, the traffic ... everybody's walking in different directions / 人混みで、みんなが違う方向へ歩いている中では、速く歩けないよな。 / it's very difficult to make headway down Oxford Street __ ... so, you, sort of, joined in the back of the march 'cause you thought __ __ almost like following an ambulance through a traffic jam / A little bit, yeah yeah yeah, / but a pedestrian version / __ __, yeah.  And, as a result, I'm ten minutes early. / That is amazing.  They do get quickly.  So, __ close the roads off, don't they? / 車を通行止めにして / everybody walking in the same direction / Of course, the problem is, people __ different directions, exactly, __ __ different speeds / Absolutely.  It is like following an ambulance __ __ pedestrian version.  There's got to be a feature in that / Slipstream the march / Um ... yeah. ... Have you ever joined in the back of a march to get somewhere ... / ... to ____ ... / ... expedite your journey, get somewhere __ __ / 渋滞で救急車の後ろについていくようなものだな / 目的地に早く着けそうだというだけの理由でデモ行進の後ろについてったことはあるか？/ or __ __ / slipstream __ __ march / it's the most bizarre form of transport / あるいは ... 「風変わりな交通手段」

 

I'll tell you what.  We've got a guest coming on ... uh ... on today's show. / You're joking. / I know.  It's not often that we are ... are organized enough to go ... to say to somebody, "Do you want to come on __ and they say "Yes" and we organize it __ but, remarkably it's happened, and Nicola ... I can never say her surname, though, ... Mantalios ... / I think it's Greek, uh, Lovett ... uh ... Nicola Mantalios / you love it? Or is that / no, that's her name, Nicola Mantalios-Lovett, uh, check it out.  You can ... uh ... google if you want.  She was ... uh ... The last time we saw her, Tom, ... in fact, the only time I've met her was when we went to do the ... uh ... charity boxing to raise money to send that little ... little ... little fella off to America to have ... which we did eventually. ... I mean, we didn't raise all the money. They needed ... the family needed half a million to get him into ... uh ... the States to have a potentially life-saving treatment, and ... uh ... we ... uh ... put on a boxing match __ comedians __ didn't we? __ went up to __ in Northumberland, and ... uh ... / raised a ... raised a ... a fair amount of cash to go towards that pot, and they raised the money and they went.  Anyway, Nicola took part in the boxing.  She fought another female ... uh ... comedian / It was a good mismatch, wasn't it? / It was / size-wise / it was a good ... / David and Goliath __ __ / ダビデとゴリアテ / it was, and some illegal moves, / Yes. / highly ... some highly illegal ... boxing ... uh ... went on. ... Anyway, we went up there.  I wasn't boxing, by the way.  I refereed the whole event.  Tom, you weren't boxing either.  You were ... / I was __ a cornerman. / You were a cornerman / you did some commentating as well, I think. / Oh, yes, I did, yeah. / ... Um ... a ... a great ... a ... a great fun ... uh ... / Extraordinary. / extraordinary day, very very odd, once in a lifetime. ... Anyway, she's coming on the show today.  Nicola.  She's a ... a Geordie (a person from Newcastle) comic.  We'll be talking with her.  Um ... I presume she's coming / I presume she's coming down from Newcastle for this / can you imagine? / Wow. / she / She must be good on that demo or something __ other stuff to do / should / here by now. / She would have been if she had slipstreamed into the back of the demo ... uh ... this is the fastest way to get around London: Slipstream on to the back of a demonstration, you are straight down, everyone's going in the same direction, they close the roads off. ... I'll tell you what.  It's a good trick.

 

Now then, features today ... uh ... your feature is ... uh ... what ... what was your feature idea? / Well, bizarre ... uh ... the most extraordinary ... uh ... form of transport that you've taken / 自分が使ったことがある風変わりな交通手段 / Yeah. ... Give __ / because __ __ people ... A friend of mine __ I'm sure __ __ they ended up going down the ... uh ... __ ... they ... they went over __ __ __ to get married / __ __ over __ __ ankle / What?  Both of them? / What do you mean? / __ __ one ankle __ in a three-legged ... "We are off to a three ... three-legged race today __ __ how about __ __ __ ankle / Well, I ... I mean, they went __ __ __ one of two ... / ... one of them ... they were getting married, / Yeah, yeah, yeah / ... they were on their way to the wedding, / Yeah, / ... and one of them went over on one of their ankles? / Yes. / Right.  So, one of the four ankles / Y__ / 25% ankle ... / 25% ankle loss, / Right, / 75% good ankle, but __ ankle __ / That's enough __ __ get by __ 75% ankle / __ __ __ __ you can't actually / you can / modern couple can get by __ __ __ __ / It's a middle-class squeeze, innit? / 中間層の搾取ってやつだ。/ She __ __ ... / __ elderly would struggle __ I mean __ 25% ankle loss __ / Anyone would struggle __ __ / No, __ __ __ young, fit and health__ __ / __ hang on __ __ stop __ 25% / for a start because / what about / feature / How much ankle do you need as a couple? / this isn't houshold earnings. / 世帯の所得じゃないんだから。足しちゃだめだよ / You can't combine ankles.  You need two each. / 一人に２つ必要だ / Uh, too late.  I've launched it. Feature 1: ... / she lost __ __ ... / ... How much ankle do you need to get by, as a couple, as a percentage? / __ __, going down the aisle on a ... uh ... hostess trolley. / What? / Yeah.  __ __ church had one __ __ / Hang on a minute now, hang on, wait, wait, wait, / You ... you get out the car, you got ... I mean, you know, I mean, it's not so bad for the groom, generally, 'cause they're in ... uh ... fairly ... uh ... urdinary shoes / __ as nervous, generally.  It's a ... / not as nervous / I / call me a __ old sexist, traditionist, but I ... I think ... I think, for a bride, generally, even today __ is __ probably still / a big day / probably, and, ... certainly ... certainly, higher heels / Yes. ... Well, not certainly, but usually, / usually, / often, often / more ... way more often than that. / Yeah, / ... more than 75%. / So, the bride had gone over on one of her ankles / Yeah, yeah, outside the church / because / high-heels / because / uneven surfaces? / Combination? / a lot of / cobbled floors outside churches, aren't they? / 教会の敷地ってのは、敷石でデコボコしているのが普通だから / rarely get smooth / you know, / all in g__ / very rare.  Nobody gets __ __ __ church. / She r__ half of her available ankles / Yeah, / ... uh ... but the show must go on, obviously, / Yeah, / and ... uh ... so, she__ in ... / "The show must go on", / and, uh ... / said the vicar? / 「お楽しみはこれからだ」と牧師が言ったんだな？ / dad, who was fairly elderly, couldn't ... / Huh huh, / ... you know, try to shoulder her up __ __ / __ __ __ fireman's lift / that sort of ... when footballers are injured / that sort of / over-the-shoulder thing / 新婦の父親はかなりお年をめしているので、新婦に肩を貸すみたいなことができそうになかった / 消防士がビルの窓から人を救助するようにはいかなかったか / you know, that sort of / using a h__ trolley / neighbouring church hall had a ... had a ... had a trolley / such as / hang on a minute now / so / she could, sort of / place her dress over / Oh, no. / __ __ / What?  Are you telling me __ nobody knew? / No, no, people knew. / Are you telling me __ she __ hostess trolley underneath her dress __ __ dress was so billowy, and she glided down ... What?  She / skateboard / s__ __ one leg up on the __ __ pushing __ along the floor with the other one __ nobody realized 'cause she had such a wide billowy dress? / People knew.  I'm just saying that it ... you know, it ... the dress helps.  I mean, if you're ever gonna ... / You'd have to unplug it, wouldn't / heats up / __ __ __ __ __ __ __ you know, ... __ __ __ trolley __ __ like __ an airplane / I'm trying think about __ hostess trolley.  I can't ... I'm ... I'm picturing ... um ... one of those ones that warm things up / keep things warm on it / Is that __ hostess trolley / I think that / hostess trolley / popular in the 80's, I think / tea is made / really made / that kind of world, __n't it? / where you plug them in / they just keep things warm __ things warm on the top.  That's how __ hostess trolley / it wasn't one of them, was it? / mini h__ bit / yeah, __ it wasn't one of them, was it? / no, no / on wheels / trolley / on wheels / down the middle of / train or __ aeroplane / One of those trolleys? / Yeah __ a bit bigger, not ... not designed necessarily to fit down an aisle / And down the aisle she went? / she went down the aisle, yeah, yeah. / spen__ the rest of the day on it or what? / I've got / j__ s__, __ __ / yeah / and __ now and again / there would be a trolley with ... with th__ little __s / never see anywhere else outside the church hall __ __ __ and __thing / Yeah, / __ __ wheel them around / trolley / and she went down the aisle / __ __ __ unusual form__ of transport.  I've got the march here. / というわけで、「風変わりな交通手段」がお題だ。俺は例としてデモ行進をあげた。 / OK. ... Unusual form to transport ... from Tom ... Tom Wrigglesworth. ... Maybe that is better than 'How much ankle do you need as a percentage?' ... Or, Feature 2:  / しょうがない。お題その２ってことでいいよ。 / How much ankle do you need, as a percentage, as a modern couple?

 

Last week, we were talking about, Thomas, I was talking about staying in a house in a ... house surprises in stayovers / Huh. / I stayed / very posh house down in ... uh ... down here in London somewhere, I __n't tell you exactly where, but, in the middle of the night, I got up to go to the toilet and stepped on a pressure pad / set off / alarm / police station / noise __ __ / no, absolutely nothing, no, no, I was ... um ... / __ you know / first I knew / __ __ boys in b__ __ uh, / Hello, Rhod, my husband got up __ __ __ toilet at night in someone's house when everyone was asleep.  He tip-toed / lost his balance and fell through a glass coffee table. / Huh. / Everyone rushed in.  He was lying in the empty frame. / and ... this is ... my favorite bit about this is the way __ signed off, ... "Great." / says / from __ / it's great / I thought it was great / from / so, I think we__ continue that 'cause __ __ launched that feature very late last week.  Uh, now then, fea ... I'll tell you what.  We've got some feature suggestions coming in today from Graham Dunlop. / I was given ... / I was today given ... / Great name, __ / It is a good name, innit? / Graham Dunlop / Yeah. ... I don't know why it is such a great name. __ __ just because the ... the tires __ so ... uh ... I don't know. ... __ ... What is it about that name? ... Graham Dunlop / just ... uh ... __ __ ... / Do you reckon he __ __ __ dynasty? / He has to be / rubbery ... / has to be / the round rubbery dy(nasty) ... / I mean, other tires are available / yeah, but they ... they ... they do trainers / シューズもつくってる / Yeah. / ... and __ __ rubber__ __ link / they don't do many traners, do they? / Do you think tires? 'cause, when I heard "Dunlop", I thought trainers / I definitely think tire__ / Do you? / Yeah.  I don't think / people / straight away. / did one trainer, didn't they? / people __ __ __ sort of / G__ __ / but did they do any others? / did / lesser version known as Brown Flash / Did they? / sort of / Dunlop Brown Flash? / Yeah, yeah / Are you sure, mate? / Yeah. / Sounds like a school playground joke. / No, no, no, no. there's two ... two ... I don't __ __ two __ __ / Are you sure / this is / to me / are you sure / didn't happen __ / me / this sounds like a classic __ / yeah / your parents __ __ Christmas __ __ pair of Dunlop Green Flash / other trainers are available / that / this story / gonna use these / you have to / I have to. ... Yeah. ... So, you / then your parents got you some supermarket thing and gave you them and went, "These are Brown Flash.  Haven't you heard of them?  They're really ... " / こういうのがあるんだよ。知らなかった？ / __ better than __ / My parents gave me a pair of Slazenger ... uh ... it was either __ trainer__ / or / football boots / about seven years old at __ point __ __ a pair of Slazenger football boots for my birthday, and I was, like, wore them __ to school / Look at these.  I've got __ / went, "My mother __ worked / Tesco / Tesco's own brand __ __ got "S" on the side __ / __ or something / They were just ... they were just Tesco's own brand / they / just had an "S" on the side / as / me / as Slazenger / Were you devastated __ __ ... how __ __ boots __?  Were they ... ? / ... They were all right until I found out they were supermarket home-brand, and then / of course, they weren't good enough. / __ __ / huh? uh ... what ... what victims we are, eh?  What silly brand-led fools we are ! ... Anyway, Graham Dunlop __ __ other sirnames are available. / He has to be part of __ __ no ... no way / Is he part of the dynasty? / Well __ __ if he is, then, good __ him / I'm sure he's ... he never needs trainers or tires.  He's ... he's got, like, __ ... / It would be quite annoyed if __ __ not part of __ dynasty / そういう名前をしているくせに実は全然関係ない、親戚でも何でもないとなったら、腹立つよな / good feature:  Are you part the dynasty / your name / J__ P__ / people think you are / 有名企業と同じ名前だがその企業とは何の関係もない、そんな人を募集します。 / Yeah, / name / and people think / __ must be / Steve Nike, for example, yeah. ... Jeremy Twix / You'd be constantly going, "Yeah. ... No, I'm not, No. 

 

Arther in P__ says, "My name is Arther Weetabix. / No way. / No. / The problem is, I __ belong to the cornflake dynasty / says / yeah, OK, thanks, Arther / very good / Kellogg__ / Yeah.  That's a good one.  That's a good one.  Uh ... text from Emma in __, another area of Cardiff, ... / Have you ever heard about a man called / twitter / people tweet him / shoes __ __ shop / John is a guy from America / he kindly answers every tweet, telling / real John L__.  The company sent __ a basket with __ cushion as a thank you. / Cushion? / Well, I'll tell you what.  It makes it all worthwhile, __n't it? / クッションがもらえたのか。わざわざツイートバックしたかいがあったな。... って、あるか？ / would you bother tweeting them all back?  I ... I definitely would not bother / saying, "It's not me.  It's not me. ..." / tweet / would you? / if you've got, ... well, ... / if / I suppose / in America / __ so weird, right? / I mean, it's one thing if you are called / Graham Dunlop, which __ started this feature off about what's the worst ... sort of ... uh ... surname to have to be mistaken / brand / such a / quite a bad one, innit? / yeah yeah yeah yeah, yeah / that is quite / bad one, even though it is such a normal name. / Well, strangely, though, like, if you ... / I__ just realized / still haven't / if you met someone called Jones, you'd never think, "Huh, bootmaker__ __ you must be part of the bootmaker__ / Huh, bootmaker / there's enough Jones' out there / Right, right / enough L__ out there / when I / you / if I met J__ L__ / that guy, I wouldn't think, "I wonder / John L__ / would you? / if you are old / No. ... I mean, "Churchhill", as well, you know, ... Do you think / is __ __ shoe maker / or is it the ... / Insurance / ... prime minister / __ / all sorts / great conversation starter.  "__ dynasty __ __ ... Can you save __ 10% on my car insurance / もしかして、あの保険の人ですか？ ここで知り合ったよしみで、私の自動車保険料、10% 安くなりませんか？ / You are none of them? / Yeah, yeah, / __ __ bother__ / next __ __ dinner party. / なに、あんた、あの有名な靴メーカー、保険会社、首相、どれとも全く関係がないというのか。もう二度とパーティーに来ないでくれ。 / Uh ... / Hi Rhod, / this is Graham Dunlop / Oh, wow. / It's a funny name, innit? / I always thought / Graham / Look at this / today ... I was today given / It's an unusual way of writing it. ... / he was given a 16-month calendar. / Oh. / oh, hang on a minute / Rosy __ __ / There could be somebody coming up at the door.  Ruff Ruff, who's there? __ __ __ behind __ __ she won't ... __ ... she won't stop shouting to __ __ we'll just wait a second.  Hold on. ... That's ... uh ...dog, ... that's the dog, / ええと、今のは犬の声です / I say, rather unnecessarily __ explain__ / 言う必要もないですね / I was given a 16-months calendar, and my first thought was, what would Rhod say? / Huh, OK.  Uh ... / When do I put it up?  When do I take my old one down? / says Graham Dunlop. / It'll obviously overwrap with my current one, which I write important things on. ... Kind Regards, Graham Dunlop ... / I don't know.  Tom, can you help / good on this kind of things / Kind Regards, / I mean / I mean, when does it ... are ... are we talking, like, a wall planner?  That's a calendar, isn't it? / yeah, I think / I don't think / any doubt about what this is / No.  You know, I mean ... / it's not a diary, right? ... / sort ... sort of ... / some sort of display / calendar, isn't it? / ... apart from / a__ / カレンダーは普通は壁にかけるだろ / 普通はな。アドベント・カレンダーを除いて。あれは暖炉に置くものだ。  / yeah / yes, um ... and ... the calen(dar) ... because a lot of calendars have that __ bit anyway, like, when you buy them in ... you remember __ filofax / Yes. / was ... uh ... / seems / long time ago / filofax / yeah. ... But they often had a calendar insert __ __ __ diary.  That's why __ __ / There were all sorts of inserts __ back there / global map / global map / metric conversions / yeah, uh, common names like, ... like, uh, stuff you do if you get certain medical conditions / 救急措置とか / capital cities / capital cit(ies), yeah / all sorts / internet / really / nice / nice / don't know why / bother / have you never heard of filofax? / あんな便利なものがあったのに、なぜインターネットなんてできたんだろう？ インターネットを作った人はファイロファックスを知らなかったのかな。

 

__ __ in Cardiff says / this is on the subject of brand name dynasties / Oh yeah / People often ask my husband if he's related to the people who make gloves. / Oh, come on / What is he called? / __ __ __ ... I don't know / it doesn't say.  But __ __ sirname is D__, innit? / Neither of us / even heard / I mean, __, when you say, "People often ask your husband is he's related to the people / make / I mean, come on, how often does this happen? / I've never heard __ / not like / Graham Dunlop, is it? ... or Jimmy Twix / they are inundated. / Inundated. / almost __ __ __ meet someone / you must / saying / Hello, I'm / before you ask, no, I'm not / yeah / Dunlop / I__ just leave it / 詮索しないでくれ / no way / Before you ask, ... / 確かに同じだが、よくある名前過ぎる。そんなこときくやつはいないだろ。あんたが自分から言い出すんじゃないのか？ / あなた、どうせ質問するでしょうから前もっていっておきますが、 / ... I'm not / I mean / if it was string-backed / yeah / __ __ / oh yeah, yeah / string-backed / before you a__ / __ __ actually a brand name of glove / どうせ言うだろうから先に言っとくけど、そうだよ、手袋のブランド名だよ。 / if / go to glove brand / I've got nothing / I've got not nothing / F__?  Not a brand, is it? / 手袋のブランド名を挙げてみろと言われても、ひとつも思い浮かばない / not a brand / ミトン ... とか、ブランド名じゃないよね。単なる手袋の種類だ。 / are / elbow / elbow glove / Is that even ... / well / think / I meant / sleeve / I didn't mean ... uh ... sort of ... / sleeve / long-sleeved / they / Is that even a thing? / そんなものあるの？ / sleeve starts at the shoulder / down / I mean / feature in that, innit? / __ __ __ __ __ you've just re-invented the top __ __ / Uh, anyway, it says / neither of us / even heard of / isn't related to the p__ either / yeah / we / causing problems __ __ / Hi Rhod, on the topic of strange things that happened when you stayed over at someone else's house, I __ always remember being invited / posh mate's house for a stayover when I was at school.  On arriving, my friend's mother gave me a menu so I could choose what I wanted for my tea / no way / A menu? / No way. ... I __ __ __ even __ sure __ I believe that. / __ __ / Jason in Halifax / name / Jason Halifax / another one / I've got a text / Clive in Cardiff / Hey, hang on a minute / I'm sorry / I haven't finished __ Jason in H__ __ yet, mate / ... on arriving / house / menu / I'm gonna read this again.  I'm gonna read this again. / __ __ the end / topic / strange things / happen / always remember being invited to a posh mate's house for a stay-over when I was at school.  On arriving, my friend's mother gave me / menu / so I could choose / starters, mains and desserts / アペリティフ、主菜、そしてデザートが書かれてあって ...  / No way. ... __ was it a menu, like, to pick / I would choose / That's unbelievable. / __ beef Wellington or fishfinger sandwich / n__ / yeah / Beat that. / さあ、これに勝てるものが出てくるか？ / That ... I think that even beats me stepping on a pressure pad and the police being called.  That is amazing.

 

Rhod Gilbert on BBC Radio Wales.

 

Now then, Nicola Mantalios ... I always say your name / I can't help it.  I can't help it / __ __ f__ / I / give / bit / probably isn't there / ついエキゾチックな響きを感じて、そのように読んでしまうが、別にそんな要素は、もともとないのでしょうね？ / how / yeah / you put a G__ spin on it / I can't help that. / Is that deliberate? / Well, yeah __ __ __ intention / at the same time / just me accent / わざとそうしている部分もあるけど、私のもともとのアクセントのせいでもある / but / spoke / last time you were on the show / that we did / back __ __ last year, Tom was __ __ a cornerman, / セコンド / I was a referee, Nicola Mantalios was one of the boxers. / It was this year, actually.  It was February / it was this year / it / like a long time ago / It does feel like a long time ago, raising money for / chap / Northumberland / go to the States for potentially ... uh ... life-saving cancer treatment, which, uh, good luck to them __ family / but / you were one of the boxers, and you ... I thought / I'll level with you / when you / 'cause I was doing the "ladies and gentlemen, our next fight, between Nicola Mantalios / and who did you / P__ __ / P__ __ / P__ __, another great name. / Well, that's her stage name. I ... I don't know if I should reveal / her real name / her real name is / Emma / I've done it now. ... There you go. / __ __ / Uh, something like that, yeah. ... __ __ __ __ __ / 彼女の本当の名前をここであかしていいものかどうか ... あのね、___ っていうの。あーあ、言っちゃった。 / gotta say it with flare. / uh, so, you fought her ... uh __ when you got in the ring, I thought ... I thought you __ like / stepped in very late / the fight was on / Sunday night / and __ I found / Tuesday afternoon / I was / you agreed to do it / yeah, but, ... __ __ acually I found out / 'cause / said __ I would be ... sort of ... a stand-in / like, I / to have ... __ yeah __ understudy ... understudy __ / was it Celia Pacquola, the Australian comic? ... Celia Pacquola, I think, dropped out, didn't she? / It was L__ / L__ M__? / Yeah. / She dropped out. / Yeah / and you stepped in at about days to go / Yes / sort of, said / I'm willing to step in __ as long as I / audience and just be like, "Yeah, I / get in / so, I / a little bit __ __ / so / you / 6 days / 6 days, yeah / doing / those 6 days / I __ __ remember now / we did talk about this / last time you were on, yeah / it was __ Saturday morning __ I spoke to you / Yeah, / before the boxing, and I was ... um ... heading to my cousin's house __ the afternoon / __ __ how to ... / That's right. / wrists / how to stand and how to box / he / only illegal moves / night, __ I remember / as a referee, I didn't have much to do, I have to say, 'cause I didn't know much about boxing / that was / my, sort of, __ most memorable moment of the night / in front of __ thousand-strong audience, with many many cameras, you ... you, sort of, launched / what would you call / Tom? / how would you describe the move? / you know / when a ... a wasp / uh / Yes, / flies in front of you __ __ picnic / what's behind your ear / you swing your arm back / you / backhand / you back-punched on __ face / that was  me __ __ fighting / __ __ / she was getting on me nerves, so ... and, also, I didn't know how to box, I thought, "Well, I__ just / I thought I was just having a fight / ボクシングのことは知らなかったものだから。要するにケンカすればいいのね、と思って / back-hand / is ... is the backhand / illegal move, though? / yeah / you can't do / back-hand / like that / why, though? / しかも、ゴングは鳴ってて、もうそのラウンドはとっくに終わってたのに / I don't ... I don't know / __ __ __ / __ __ fight is finished, ... __ __ other thing you should __ mention__ / and you swept her leg / yeah, __ __ in __ __ / even know / having a little rest / and then ... / you were the only fighter that night, I think, who ... who stopped the fight __ __ I can't repeat what you said to me. / I can't repeat ... I can't repeat what your words were ... why you wanted to stop the fight / it was because / but / used more colorful language / you said ... / emotions / you used / very colored word__ to describe "I'm very tired" ... you just went / I can't go / I'm too tired / Well, I was ... I was __ __ __ stand there for the rest of the ... sort of ... I think there was only __ __ seconds left / long left / side for a bit, and then go / 'cause / she ... she trained quite a lot / Yeah / she had been having / like / medicine ball __ __ __ stomach__ __ stuff like that / 重たいボールをおなかに落としたりとか、そういうことを / she / she __ __ like / jungle training / If I __ __, like / I would have been doing / training / as well / Well, we might __ __ another one day, / Yeah, / who knows, for another good cause

 

Uh ... Unusual Transport is ... uh ... __ Tom's got on the go after seeing __ __ bride go__ down the aisle / hostess trolley / having a go / today / s__-lined / streamlined himself / back / march to get / London street quicker / Huh, OK. / I have / Have you? / from __ / like marche__s / where / from / English language comes from, __n't __? __ __ ... / I think / where the English language comes from, wasn't / I think it's where the English language gets butchered __ / Yeah, right. / where is __ __ __ Newcastle or __ / It's neither.  It's a town of its own right.  It's / halfway between the two / OK, sandwitched between the two / Yeah.  So, it's ... / Which one do you side ... side with __ __ __ ever __ __ fight? / probably more inclined towards Newcastle. / All right.  OK.  just so I know, 'cause I / have to ... / I wanna be on the same side as you backhanders. / I have to change metros / a little bit less convenient / yeah / so, if I was gonna be / while we are on the subject of Newcastle / you ... um ... you were ... you ... sort of ... came into our ... uh ... __ __ into view in 2011 __ think __ funny __ __ Edinburgh ... uh ... competition, which, Tom, you ... you ... you won that in 2004, am I right? / Something like that, yeah / I did it in 2002 / got to the final / lost, alongside such __ __ Greg Davies and M__ __ / you lost as well / Yeah. ... Didn't backhand anyone, though / そのときは誰かをバックハンドでたたいたわけじゃないけど。 / look at this now / stop / here we are now, here we are now, in the kitchen, on Radio Wales.  Huh? / doing all right / who says __ __ __ holds you back / I have no idea / You won a national competition __ __ __ here you are, sitting in front of my fridge. / __ ... __ ... / on Radio Wales / says awful lot about __ award itself, __n't it? / 賞をとったものの、こうして今、オレの自宅の冷蔵庫の前でラジオ番組をしているという体たらく。/ これで、それがどれほどの賞かってのがわかるよな。 / It's a really nice fridge, though / it is quite nice / it is / think / in front of / Radio Wales / dreaming of it but then quickly thinking,  "Come on, Tom, __ __ __ yourself / 冷蔵庫の前でラジオをやるってのは、夢に見たことはあるが、すぐ、おれなんかにはできっこない、って、思ったもんだよ。 / imposter syndrome / down / doesn't happen to people like me / can ... can ... can I read __ text, Rhod / two / in front of me / You can, but then __ __ come back to ... uh ... Nicola's ... uh ... well, early, at the moment, career. / OK. / Yeah. / keen to read this, right? ... / Nicola / to tell you this because I come here ... whenever I come __ __ show, I __ bring features, right? / Rhod, mercilessly, uh, explains why __ __ never work / I've got the best response to a feature ever, right? / first one, unusual mode of transport / right? / bride __ go down the aisle / hostess trolley after / ankle / that is good one.  I accept that is a good one. / Uh ... this ... uh ... __ __ __ __ Amy __ ... Amy / got a lift home from a pub in Sydney in a bin lorry. / Amy __ / part of __ band __ / Yeah, / ... from the 80's / did / some girls / stuff like that / She probably is. / Yeah. / ... But, anyway this is the greatest piece of correspondence I've ever, ever seen / don't build it up, mate / don't build it up / ハードルを上げるな / Hi Rhod, / this is from __ in Bristol, right? / Hi Rhod, I'm __.  My dad __ in the navy / sea for a long period of time.  We / we / only know __ __ __ when he __ __ home / we lived in a village in Scotland which, at the time, didn't / or even a chip shop.  He once surprised us by knocking on the door carrying a Chinese takeaway. ... He had gone to the Chinese near the train station in the next town and asked them if __ __ delivered / he then asked / if he could / buy the food / and / deliver him with the food / he got a Chinese takeaway home / that is a good / Chinese takeaway / 配達してもらうついでにのっけてもらった / That is a good one. __ I don't know if / greatest correspondent / set __ up too much __ __ I was expecting / お前が期待値を上げたもんだから ... / the greatest / he got delivered / delivered / Chinese / back of the moped?  How was it? / c__ed into / little / into, like, a box / ... Was he in a foiled tray, was he? / that is good / if he / in a / f__ tray / burst out of it, like / wedding cake / ウェディング・ケーキに隠れてびっくりさせるやつみたいに / __ __ on his head / bean sprout__ in his hair / that would be cool. __ __ / you know / you know the / in about the ... the ... um ... the guy who __ __ __ __ house and had a menu / That's amazing, isn't it? / The posh one. / Yeah, / __ presented with a menu __ __ __ __ his tea / Well, when you first said that / that's totally normal because we were always presented with menus of ... like ...  / 最初は、そんな話はよくあったわ、って思ったの / __ __ chippy __ quality pizza __ __ __ __ curry house / a menu / yeah, we always had that going on, yeah. / No, you mean that you went round to your friend's house for tea and you__ be offered __ series of / what takeaway do you wanna get? / メニュー、ったって、ピザハットとかバーガーキングのメニューだろ / No, no. / menu ... / Yeah, / ... from the parents in the house __ __ what would you like / cook these dishes / __ another world, isn't it? / 別世界の話ね。 / That is a different world.  That is definitely a different world. ... That is a good one, Tom.  That's the one to beat so far.  That is the one to beat / さあ、いまのところこれが最高。これに勝てるものはあるかな？ / __ __ __ Chinese takeaway / __ __ actually ties __ __ / Rhod / What was that, mate? / That was __ __ lost in the post / 'cause I a Chinese takeaway / remember, I / lost in the post / so, it's amazing __ __ / Chinese takeaway / actually __ ... probably __ __ go __ to this one __ / let's face facts / let's face facts / __ __ last two features __ the answer __ __ Chinese takeaway / Uh ... / I was once given a lift across __ town __ __ d__ truck driven by a pal / dropped me off __ __ pub I was going to __ __ __ in Cardiff / different area in Cardiff / fair enough.  I'll tell you what.  It's not gonna beat the Chinese takeaway.  So far, that's the one to beat. / なに、清掃車の運転手をしている友達がいて、その清掃車でパブまで送ってもらった？ うーん、まだ弱いな。今のところ中華のテイクアウェイがナンバーワンだ。

 

Now then, Celebrity Out Of Context Bingo.  We've got complaint about it here.  It's been going for a very long time on this radio show / uh / I've been listening to (and enjoying) / no need to / "enjoying" in / brackets, mate / listening / enjoying / your podcast for years / I actually remember when you first introduced Celebrity Out Of Context Bingo.  I __ __ __ quite as strict as it used to be / nor the celebrities quite as out of context. / I mean, __ __ __ mate, innit?  I mean, ... Here is ... / out of context / He's a purist, isn't he?  He is a purist. / Andrew, this is from, Andrew, he says, / Here is the benchmark of quality, from which you should judge all future entries. / I kind of feel / mis__ / because we do / judge / out of 20 / co-host / usually, uh, / chance / to judge the entry.  So, we do judge __ against the benchmark / he says, "Here is / future entries / best-ever entry __ one of the reasons for launching the game in the first place / Alice Cooper seen buying ornamental tea spoons in an a__ shop. ... Please get back to this more stringent quality control and save my on-going weekly frustration / ... uh ... / half-hour frustration / it __ __.  Right.  OK. Uh, well, let's see if these are any good for you / Morning, Rhod and team,  A little while ago, we / in Cardiff.  He was out of context / Why do you think / __ O'S__ / out of context? / because he was / budget / value ... you know / because he's loaded and he was / was wearing __ tennis outfit / どこがアウトオブコンテキストだ？/ 金持ちだから値引き品を眺めているのは変だってことじゃないか / where is he from / O'S__ / London, I think / Is he?  Snooker player? / Yeah. / he says, / he was out of context because he was ... / I mean, Andrew, I mean, you were complaining about the quality a minute ago, and I poo-pooed your bit, but, to be honest / I agree.  This is rubbish.  I don't even __ __ it. / he was out ... / out of pocket because / out of context because he was looking / shirt with no pockets / Huh. / joke / it's a joke / cause / put / joke / that / 'cause there was no pockets __ __ table. / ... Huh. ... / oh, oh, __, __, yeah / I could ... I assumed it was a joke / but it's __ waistcoat / looking at waistcoat / no pockets / then ... then / possibly / poor entry / nonetheless, but still relevant / pockets / actual t__ / could be / I'm with Andrew.  That is ... / Andrew is not gonna have a good week, is he? / listen to / maybe he was arguing about __ing __ __ back / Andrew, close your ears, mate, / 今すぐ耳を塞いだほうが身のためだぞ / close your ears 'cause you are not gonna be happy with this: / afterwards, we saw him in the queue.  We all know / really the quality__ dropped, Andrew / really?  Where's your proof? / いつもはキューを持っているはずの彼が、なんと、キューに並んでいたんです / looking for opportunities here / We do get those ... we do get those as well.  That's ... uh ... from / I think it's ... uh ... pronounced / now / I / very long one here / this / back in the game / Andrew, ... Let's see if Andrew / happy / out of 20 / down / I quite like this next one coming up / very long.  Right?  So, strap in ... strap in for __ __ ... what are you gonna give that one out of 20? / low / I / 3 / 3.  Fine. / ダジャレに頼りすぎてる / is that two low / really harsh / ちょっと厳しすぎたかしら / generous, I would say. / いや、気前が良すぎるくらいだ / Hi ... Hi Rhod / um ... / my favorite section of the show is Ce ... Celebrity Out Of Context Bingo.  But __ __ only dawned on me / I can participate __ __ expect / never to contact the show again.  I've been __ing out on this story for years / it occur__ / now / almost topical.  30 years ago, my son started ... 30 years ago, my son started / nursery / my favorite __ __ using my free three hours / wander around a huge bookstore in Bristol / highlight of my week / even though I / really afford to buy anything, I was just browsing __ __ just browsing / 30 years ago, she got a kid, __ __ __ __ __, she goes to bookshop, hangs out. / Huh huh. / One afternoon in the book shop, when she was hanging out, there was a book-signing ... / Huh huh, / ... by Mary Berry. / Huh. / ... She had a pile of books of mile-high on __ desk.  I swear, the only movement __ __ occasional tumbleweed whistling across the store, the shop was embarrassingly empty apart from me, Mary Berry and her PR person, / Huh, / ... and two staff members, all trying to pretend it wasn't happening. / All ... / just try to pretend the whole s__ __ __ / ... The thing is ... / she says, __ G__ / from Bristol / the thing is / completely ruined my afternoon.  I was so mortified on Mary Berry's behalf.  The worst thing was, I couldn't even afford to buy one of her books.  And that would have probably made it worse as it would have been clear that I was only doing it out of pity.  I wish / "Have faith, Mary / a national treasure, and I __ probably be able to afford one or two of your books / Wow wow wow,  when was this?  When was this? / 30 years ago. / the ... what ... what was Marry Berry doing 30 years ago? / she / Not selling books? / of course, Mary Berry has been a national treasure for nearly 300 years. / I had no idea. / 知らなかったよ / Mary Berry made her first s__ in 1640. ... I bet not many people know that / she / dynasty / yeah, she ... exactly.  She pre-dates ... predates the ... the __ / __ pre-dates __ __ / Um ... anyway, so, there we are.  This is the situation / Marry Berry, on her own, doing a book-signing, with nobody queuing up / a young Mary ... well, yeah / you know / yeah / um ... we are big fans of Mary Berry, by the way.  We are just being silly. ... Now then, / Any .. anyway, Rhod, you may be thinking / hardly out of context, ironically or otherwise, as a book-signing __ what celebrities do / どこがアウトオブコンテキストなんだ？とあなたはきくでしょう。有名人がサイン会をするのは普通のことではないかと。そうかもしれません。しかし ... / and you would be right, except, there she was, Marry Berry, and the very last thing her book was selling like was hot cakes. / そのとき、メアリー・バリーの本は、ホットケーキのように売れているとはとても言えなかったんです。メアリー・バリーにあるまじきことじゃないですか。/ Huh, you can't argue that. / That's it / __ whole page of A4 to say that she saw Mary Berry / how much are you gonna give that one? / I enjoyed that one. / I've got one more __ __ __ move on. / OK.  I'm gonna give that one / 14 / 14.  OK.  Andrew, I'm not sure if you enjoyed that or not / Andrew cannot complain about that. / he can't / OK. / and, if you do complain about / about the quality of the ... uh ... / get this one: / My grandfather saw Emperor Haile Selassie on the square in Gorslas. / I don't know __ __ __ __ / emperor / of Ethiopia / Emperor Haile Selassie on the square / understand that / town's square / Gorslas / little town in Wales / OK. / everyone thought my grandfather lost __ plot when he / told / later, we found out / had been / the area / I'll tell you what.  Come on, come on, Andrew, you've got / Emperor Haile Selassie / E__ / on the square / that is pretty damn good / you / come on, that's gotta be high. / was doing / it doesn't matter / Emperor Haile Selassie / Well, I felt like / it's like / like seeing J__ C__ in S__ __. ... That's what it is. / What a stag do ! / on a stag do / 新郎の婚前パーティーの余興にジュリアス・シーザーを呼ぶようなものだぞ / be a high score / give / mark / 16 / You've won.  Congratulations.  Andrew, I hope you are satisfied with the quality.  It picked up at the end

 

whole show / Rhod Gilbert live on Saturday mornings, BBC Radio Wales, 11 till 1. 

 

 

 

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